What Should an Employer Do When an Employee Is Struggling With Mental Health?
When an employee is struggling with their mental health, it can be difficult for an employer to know what to do.
You may notice that someone who was previously engaged has become withdrawn, overwhelmed or unusually quiet. They might be making more mistakes, taking more time off, struggling to meet deadlines or finding it difficult to manage their usual workload.
As an employer or manager, you may be wondering:
Should I say something?
What if I make things worse?
How much should I ask?
What support can I actually provide?
What are my responsibilities as an employer?
You don't need to be a mental health professional to support an employee. Often, one of the most helpful things an employer can do is notice a change, approach the person with care and help connect them with appropriate support.
For New Zealand workplaces, employee wellbeing is increasingly recognised as an important part of creating healthy, sustainable workplaces. Workplace counselling can provide employees with confidential support while also giving employers a practical way to respond when someone is struggling.
How can you tell when an employee may be struggling?
Mental health difficulties don't always look the same, and there is no single set of signs that means someone is experiencing a mental health problem.
A change in behaviour or work performance doesn't necessarily mean that someone is struggling with their mental health either. There may be many reasons for changes at work, including workload, family responsibilities, relationship difficulties, physical health, financial pressure, grief or other life circumstances.
However, an employer may notice changes such as:
Increased absenteeism or frequent sick leave
Arriving late or leaving work early more often
Difficulty concentrating
Increased mistakes or missed deadlines
Becoming unusually withdrawn or quiet
Appearing overwhelmed or emotionally distressed
Changes in communication or interactions with colleagues
Reduced engagement or motivation
Difficulty managing usual responsibilities
Working significantly longer hours or appearing unable to switch off
Increased conflict or tension with colleagues
A noticeable change in someone's usual behaviour
These signs shouldn't be used to diagnose an employee.
Instead, they can be a reason to check in.
Why might an employee be struggling?
Mental health at work can be affected by many different factors, and sometimes the cause has little to do with the workplace itself.
An employee could be dealing with:
Work-related stress
High workloads, unrealistic deadlines, staffing shortages, unclear expectations, organisational change or ongoing workplace conflict can contribute to stress and overwhelm.
Personal or family circumstances
Relationship difficulties, parenting responsibilities, caring responsibilities, financial pressure, bereavement or other significant life events can affect someone's ability to cope at work.
Anxiety or depression
Anxiety may involve persistent worry, feeling on edge or finding it difficult to concentrate. Depression can affect energy, motivation, sleep, concentration and enjoyment.
Employees may not always tell their manager what they are experiencing.
Major life changes
Moving house, becoming a parent, experiencing separation, dealing with illness or adjusting to another major change can all affect wellbeing.
Workplace relationships
Conflict, bullying, harassment, poor communication or feeling unsupported can have a significant effect on an employee's wellbeing.
Understanding that there may be something happening beneath the surface can help employers respond with empathy rather than immediately assuming an employee is disengaged or not performing.
What should an employer do if an employee is struggling?
1. Notice the change
You don't need to wait until there is a serious problem before checking in.
If you have noticed a meaningful change in an employee's behaviour, performance or wellbeing, consider whether a private conversation could be appropriate.
The goal isn't to investigate their personal life. It is simply to let them know that you have noticed they may not be themselves and that support is available.
2. Have a private conversation
Choose an appropriate time and private setting.
You could say:
“I've noticed you haven't seemed quite yourself recently, and I wanted to check in. How are things going?”
Or:
“I've noticed you've seemed under a bit of pressure lately. Is there anything you need from us at the moment?”
Keep the conversation open rather than making assumptions about what is happening.
Avoid saying things such as:
“You seem depressed.”
“You need to get yourself together.”
“Everyone is stressed.”
“What's wrong with you?”
“You need to tell me exactly what's happening.”
An employee may not want to discuss personal circumstances with their manager, and that's okay.
3. Listen rather than trying to fix everything
Managers don't need to have all the answers.
Sometimes the most useful response is simply listening and acknowledging what the person has said.
You might say:
“That sounds like a lot to be dealing with.”
Or:
“Thank you for telling me. Let's look at what support might be helpful.”
You don't need to become the employee's counsellor.
Your role is to support the person within the workplace and help connect them with appropriate services when needed.
4. Discuss practical workplace support
Depending on the circumstances, there may be practical changes that could help.
These might include:
Reviewing workload or deadlines
Clarifying priorities
Temporarily adjusting responsibilities
Considering flexible working arrangements where appropriate
Providing additional supervision or check-ins
Encouraging regular breaks
Discussing leave or time away from work
Addressing workplace conflict or other contributing issues
Connecting the employee with an Employee Assistance Programme (EAP) or counselling service
The appropriate response will depend on the individual and the workplace.
5. Respect privacy and confidentiality
An employee should not be expected to disclose their diagnosis or provide unnecessary personal information simply because they are experiencing difficulties.
Employers should handle personal information carefully and respect the employee's privacy.
If an employee does choose to share information about their mental health, respond respectfully and avoid discussing their circumstances with colleagues who do not need to know.
When should an employer encourage professional support?
Managers are not expected to diagnose or treat mental health conditions.
If an employee is experiencing ongoing distress, anxiety, low mood, significant stress or difficulty coping, professional support may be appropriate.
This could include:
Workplace counselling
An EAP service
Their GP or other healthcare professional
A psychologist or counsellor
Appropriate community or mental health services
Workplace counselling can be particularly useful because it gives employees an opportunity to speak with an independent professional about what they are experiencing.
An employee doesn't necessarily need to be experiencing a diagnosed mental health condition to benefit from counselling.
Counselling can also help with stress, relationships, grief, workplace pressure, life changes, anxiety and feeling overwhelmed.
What if the employee's mental health is affecting their work?
This can be one of the more challenging situations for employers.
Supporting an employee's wellbeing doesn't mean that performance expectations have to disappear.
Employers can approach the situation with both compassion and clarity.
For example, you may need to acknowledge that an employee is experiencing difficulties while also discussing specific work expectations, responsibilities and reasonable steps that could help them meet those expectations.
The conversation might involve:
What aspects of work are currently difficult?
Are there practical barriers that can be addressed?
What support is available?
Are temporary adjustments appropriate?
What are the employee's responsibilities?
When should you check in again?
Keeping the conversation focused on the person's wellbeing and ability to work, rather than making assumptions about their diagnosis, can help maintain a respectful relationship.
What about a mental health crisis?
If you believe someone is at immediate risk of harming themselves or someone else, this is different from an ordinary workplace wellbeing conversation.
Don't try to manage an immediate crisis by yourself.
Seek urgent professional assistance and follow your organisation's emergency procedures. In an immediate emergency in New Zealand, call 111.
For mental health crisis support, local crisis assessment teams and other urgent mental health services can also provide assistance.
If an employee talks about suicide or self-harm, take what they say seriously and seek appropriate professional help rather than dismissing the conversation or promising to keep it secret.
How can workplace counselling help?
Workplace counselling provides employees with access to a confidential space outside their usual workplace relationships.
A counsellor can help someone explore what is happening and identify ways to manage difficult circumstances.
Depending on the employee's needs, counselling may involve approaches such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), solution-focused counselling, supportive counselling or other evidence-informed approaches.
The most appropriate approach will depend on the person rather than simply their workplace role.
Counselling may support employees experiencing:
Work-related stress
Anxiety
Low mood
Burnout and overwhelm
Relationship difficulties
Grief and loss
Family or parenting pressures
Workplace conflict
Major life changes
Difficulty coping with change
Personal or emotional challenges
The purpose isn't to make employees share personal information with their employer.
Instead, counselling gives employees somewhere independent to talk through what they are experiencing and consider what might help.
What can employers do to support mental wellbeing more broadly?
Supporting employee wellbeing shouldn't only happen when someone reaches breaking point.
Employers can build healthier workplaces by creating an environment where people feel comfortable asking for support.
Encourage open conversations
Managers can regularly check in with employees without making every conversation about performance.
A simple “How are things going?” can create an opportunity for someone to raise an issue early.
Review workloads
If several employees are consistently overwhelmed, the issue may not be individual resilience. It may indicate a workload, staffing or organisational problem.
Look at whether expectations, deadlines and resources are realistic.
Make support easy to access
Employees are more likely to use counselling or EAP services when they understand what is available and how confidentiality works.
Consider regularly communicating available support rather than only mentioning it when someone is already struggling.
Train managers
Managers don't need to become mental health experts, but basic training can help them recognise signs of distress, have supportive conversations and understand when to refer someone to professional support.
Create a respectful workplace
Psychological wellbeing is influenced by workplace culture.
Clear communication, respectful relationships, appropriate boundaries and effective responses to bullying or harassment can all contribute to a healthier working environment.
A culturally responsive approach to workplace wellbeing
New Zealand workplaces include people from many different cultural backgrounds, and wellbeing isn't understood in exactly the same way by everyone.
For Māori employees, wellbeing may be understood in relation to whānau, whenua, wairua and wider relationships, alongside individual emotional and physical wellbeing.
For some employees, family and community connections may be an important source of strength and support.
Employers don't need to make assumptions about what culture means for an individual. Instead, it can be helpful to create space for employees to explain what matters to them and what support feels appropriate.
A culturally responsive workplace recognises that there isn't one definition of wellbeing or one approach that works for everyone.
What should an employee expect from workplace counselling?
Employees may feel uncertain about counselling, particularly if they have never accessed it before.
An initial session generally provides an opportunity to discuss what has been happening and what the employee would like help with.
They may talk about:
What has brought them to counselling
Work-related concerns
Stress or anxiety
Relationships
Family or personal circumstances
Changes they are currently experiencing
How their wellbeing is affecting everyday life
What they would like to change
They don't need to know exactly what they need before attending.
The counsellor can help them explore their concerns and work towards practical, meaningful goals.
How ECS can support your workplace
When an employee is struggling, employers don't have to manage the situation alone.
ECS provides workplace counselling and organisational support for New Zealand businesses, employers, HR teams and employees. Access to professional counselling can give employees a confidential place to seek support while giving organisations a practical way to invest in employee wellbeing.
Workplace counselling can be relevant whether an employee is experiencing a personal difficulty, work-related stress, relationship concerns, anxiety, grief or simply feeling overwhelmed by everything they are trying to manage.
The aim is not to take responsibility for an employee's personal life away from them. It is to make appropriate support easier to access when they need it.
Taking action when an employee is struggling
You don't need to have the perfect words when approaching an employee who may be struggling.
Often, what matters most is noticing the change, approaching the person respectfully, listening without judgement and helping them access appropriate support.
For employers, early support can also be part of creating a workplace culture where people don't feel they have to reach crisis point before asking for help.
If your organisation is looking for workplace counselling in New Zealand, ECS can provide professional counselling support for employees and organisations.
Contact ECS to discuss workplace counselling and how your organisation can support employee wellbeing.
Frequently Asked Questions
What should an employer do if an employee is struggling with mental health?
Start by having a private, respectful conversation and checking in without making assumptions or attempting to diagnose the employee. Listen, discuss any appropriate workplace support and, where relevant, encourage the employee to access professional support such as workplace counselling or EAP.
Can an employer ask an employee about their mental health?
An employer can check in with an employee about their wellbeing, particularly where they have noticed a significant change. However, employees have privacy rights and should not be pressured to disclose unnecessary personal or medical information.
What are the signs an employee may be struggling?
Changes can include increased absenteeism, reduced concentration, missed deadlines, withdrawal, emotional distress, changes in communication, reduced engagement or difficulty managing usual responsibilities. These signs can have many causes and shouldn't be used to diagnose someone.
Can an employer make an employee attend counselling?
Counselling is generally most effective when a person is willing to engage with it. Employers can encourage and facilitate access to support, but should be careful about treating counselling as a disciplinary measure or making assumptions about an employee's mental health.
What is workplace counselling?
Workplace counselling provides employees with access to a professional counsellor to discuss personal, emotional or work-related concerns confidentially. It can be provided through an EAP or directly through a workplace counselling provider.
Does workplace counselling help with stress and burnout?
Counselling can provide employees with a confidential space to explore stress, overwhelm and other concerns and develop ways of managing difficult circumstances. However, employers should also consider whether workload, staffing, workplace culture or other organisational factors are contributing to employee stress.
What can an employer do to support employee wellbeing?
Employers can support wellbeing by encouraging open communication, monitoring workloads, providing appropriate flexibility, addressing workplace conflict, training managers and making professional support such as workplace counselling accessible.
Can workplace counselling help employees with personal problems?
Yes. Employees don't only experience difficulties because of work. Relationship problems, family responsibilities, grief, financial pressure and other life circumstances can affect someone's wellbeing and ability to work. Workplace counselling can provide confidential support for a range of personal and emotional concerns.
Where can employers find workplace counselling in New Zealand?
ECS provides workplace and employment counselling for New Zealand employers, HR teams and employees. Workplace counselling can be used as part of a broader employee wellbeing strategy or when an individual employee needs additional support.
When should an employer seek professional advice about an employee's mental health?
If a situation is complex, significantly affecting the workplace, involves a potential safety concern or raises questions about employment obligations, employers should consider obtaining appropriate professional advice rather than attempting to manage the situation alone.
Supporting people is part of building healthier workplaces
Mental health at work isn't simply an individual issue.
Workplaces can influence people's wellbeing through workload, culture, relationships, leadership and the support available when things become difficult.
For employers, responding with empathy doesn't mean lowering standards or taking responsibility for an employee's personal circumstances. It means recognising when someone may need support and knowing where to direct them.
If your organisation is looking for workplace counselling or employee support in New Zealand, contact ECS to discuss how professional counselling could support your employees and workplace.